


Turkeys in the News

by GE72



Category: WKRP in Cincinnati
Genre: Comedy, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-10
Updated: 2017-04-10
Packaged: 2018-10-17 08:12:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10589982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GE72/pseuds/GE72
Summary: (Season 1) A newspaper report on the events of "Turkeys Away."





	

CINCINNATI ENQUIRER  
November 22, 1978

CINCINNATI – What started out as a Thanksgiving promotion by a local radio station ended up being a public relations nightmare as it went completely awry.

The result was damages to numerous parked cars and the death of at least a dozen turkeys just before the holiday in an unimaginable way. And all because someone thought turkeys were just like any other birds.

Radio station WKRP planned the Thanksgiving promotion by having a helicopter hover over the Pinedale Mall. However, station staff had no idea what the promotion was, as station manager Arthur Carlson had kept the plan a secret, even to those closest involved.

The helicopter positioned itself over the mall at about three thousand feet, and Carlson, who was in the helicopter along with advertising executive Herb Tarlek, began to toss turkeys out of the helicopter. The belief was that the turkeys would make a safe flight down to the ground.

Except that turkeys don’t fly.

According to witnesses at the scene, turkeys began hitting the pavement within seconds of being tossed out of the helicopter. At least one turkey went through the windshield of a parked car, and some other cars sustained minor damage. The sight of the turkeys hitting the ground in such a violent manner caused the people watching at the mall to panic and run for cover inside the mall.

Some people spotted a WKRP staff member, who was there on the ground reporting on the promotion, and angrily went after him for being part of it.

WKRP programming director Andy Travis also issued a statement on behalf of the radio station, saying “We apologize for the events at the Pinedale Mall, and we will look carefully into future promotions of any kind before proceeding with them.”

A spokesman for the Pinedale Mall said that the owners and managers have banned WKRP indefinitely from doing any promotions on their property.

The local chapter of the Humane Society have also criticized the station for the promotion, citing the callous disregard of animal life.

The remainder of the turkeys that were inside the helicopter were later let loose after the helicopter landed in the mall parking lot. Those turkeys were eventually rounded up and taken to a turkey farm.

Carlson later apologized to the mall staff and the city of Cincinnati for this publicity stunt, saying it was all his idea and his alone.

“I sincerely apologize for the trouble I caused over this,” Carlson said. “I thought I had the perfect promotion for Thanksgiving.” 

He later added, “With God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.”


End file.
